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Valley of the Shadow

Valley Virginian: May 13, 1868

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The Canvass
(Column 01)
Summary: The paper reports that the campaign is heating up, and conservatives are getting "good mad." "We respectfully notify all scalawags, deluded darkeys, etc., that they can no longer run rough-shod over this State. They will be met by men and we intend to beat them." Col. J. B. Baldwin, Col. B. Christian, S. Travis Phillips, and Y. Howe Peyton are all addressing the people of Augusta.
(Names in announcement: Col. J. B. Baldwin, Col. B. Christian, S. Travis Phillips, Y. Howe Peyton)
The Conservative Ticket
(Column 02)
Summary: This is a typical plea to the Augusta County constituency to vote for conservative candidates and to vote down the radical constitution. Most important, caution is expressed. First, the author suggests, conservative men who had served the South faithfully during the war must be put in office. At this point, plans can be made on how to best counter the "enemy" radicals.
Full Text of Article:

It is with no common emotions that we place this ticket at our masthead. In this crisis empty compliments and old worn out political clap-trap is useless. The issues at stake are of too solemn and awful import--the ship is too near running upon the breakers for us, as a people, to trifle with each other.

It was our good fortune, for it is a fortune to shake hands with honest men, to be present at the Conservative Convention. In that body we did not see one who thought of self or had, what was once known as "an axe to grind." To look at the mongrel crew assembled to nominate Gen. Wells; to see what was done there--to become so disgusted that any gentleman would inevitably get sick; and then to look at the Convention of Virginia gentlemen assembled, in the Old Exchange--well, language fails to express the feelings of a Southern man.

Col. Jno. B. Baldwin, the representative man of Old Augusta, was complimented as we never saw a man or people complimented. He nobly declined the position and Col. R.E. Withers was made our standard bearer.--Col. Withers did not seek this position--it was forced upon him. He is a gentleman, an editor, and a soldier. It would be idle to tell his people about him--ask the soldier and he will tell you.

Gen. James Walker--"Stonewall Jim," we used to call him, is the candidate for Lt. Governor. He is a man all over--the only Confederate Genl. Who inherited the name of the immortal and God-inspired, T.J. Jackson. Mr. Mayre is the man of his section. Col. Marmaduke Johnson will probably be up on our section and speak for himself. He is "Candidate for the State at large to Congress" and his heart is as large as the State.

In conclusion, if we have any influence with our people, we would urge upon them, in all the sincerity of a heart that had never known a thought that was not love for them and the South, to vote the ticket and vote down the Constitution. After that work is done we can look into the next move the enemy makes against us. We repeat, vote the ticket and vote down the Constitution.--That is the sum and substance of what is left for us to do now and every man must stand up to the work, or we are irretrievably and forever lost.

A Few Good Hits at the Mongrels
(Column 02)
Summary: This particularly vicious article lambastes the Virginia Constitution. Along with a harsh attack on General Benjamin Butler, the anonymous author condemns the language of miscegenation, sarcastically referred to as "diatribes of the congo representatives." In addition, the author compares blacks to apes and baboons and claims they could never have consciously advocated for their own rights as they are incapable of that level of thought.
Full Text of Article:

Lexington, Va.
May 7th, 1868

Dear Virginian

The State treasury being exhausted the Convention has adjourned. No longer held together by the "cohesive power of public plunder," the body naturally falls to pieces, and disintegration into its original obscure and repulsive elements. The season for "carpet bags" is over! A glut in the market has already ensued; and the Richmond merchants are now prepared to sell out the entire stock at a heavy discount on prime cost. In the meantime the former "pensioners on State bounty" yelped "carpet baggers" find, like Othello, their occupation gone. It is to be hoped that they will go too, and patriotically "leave Virginia for Virginia's good," which would probably be the only act of patriotism any of them are capable of performing.--Butler (the beast) compares himself to a dog--well, every dog has his day--but we have too much respect for the canine race to admit the justice of his comparison. His well known "hankering after spoons," and his visual and moral obliquities would easily acquit him of any natural affinities with dogs, except perhaps with those who have "rebelphobia," as Bill Arp would express it. It must be admitted, however, that he does belong to the carnivorous class of animals, but fortunately of a species "Sui Generis."

I you design publishing that issue of outrage politely denominated the "Constitution of Virginia," it is respectfully suggested to have a few copies carefully "bottled up" as specimens for our future State Museum, and which, some years hence might be appropriately added to an American edition of Disrael's "Curiosities of Literature." The verbatim diatribes of the congo representatives would constitute another valuable contribution and splendidly serve to illustrate the beauties of miscegenation as applied to the English language. These last might be gotten up in the elegant modern style of embellishment, and we have no doubt each of the ebony orators and miscegenating "carpet baggers" would cheerfully furnish their photographs (including that of the "Senogoper") for this purpose. The classic features of the gentlemen from Africa, and the pure diction of their "eloquent" harangues would show a "unity of design" little dreamed of by our benighted forefathers; for now it is perfectly demonstrated that
"All partial evil's universal good,
All discord, harmony not understood."

We dislike to hear these unique exponents of American civilization--these ideal types of reconstructed union citizens so continually compared to apes and baboons! In the name of the four handed fraternity we protest against so grievous a wrong: for we are very sure that no anthropoid apes, or well raised gorillas would have voluntarily assumed responsibilities so far transcending their capacities; or, having assumed them, would have behaved with such egregious folly, and it illustrates the truth:
"That fools rush in where monkeys fear to tread.
But this is the age of humbug. "Viva la bagatelle."

[No Title]
(Column 02)
Summary: The paper argues that only those who like "paying taxes" to "support negro schools and office holders" will vote for the constitution.

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[No Title]
(Column 02)
Summary: Mr. Fred Scheffer has opened the Virginia Hotel.
(Names in announcement: Fred Scheffer)
(Column 02)
Summary: The ladies of Staunton's Methodist Church will hold a supper in the town hall on May 26th. The ladies of the Presbyterian Church will hold a fair there on June 1st.
(Column 02)
Summary: Confederate General D. H. Hill lectured before the Staunton Lyceum on Monday.
[No Title]
(Column 02)
Summary: The paper touts the healing powers of the warm springs and announces that Maj. P. H. Woodward will manage them.
(Names in announcement: Maj. P. H. Woodward)
(Column 03)
Summary: Miss Minnie A. Tipping of Staunton and Dr. D. Ed Beall of Hampshire County, West Virginia, were married on May 6th by the Rev. Mr. Baker.
(Names in announcement: Minnie A. Tipping, Dr. D. Ed. Beall, Rev. Baker)
(Column 03)
Summary: William N. Wilson and Miss Mary V. Poague, both of Augusta, were married on May 7th by the Rev. Frank Bowman.
(Names in announcement: William N. Wilson, Mary V. Poague, Rev. Frank Bowman)
(Column 03)
Summary: Claude Eugene Turner, son of Prof. A. J. and Kate M. Turner died on May 11th. He was 9 years old.
(Names in announcement: Claude Eugene Turner, Prof. A. J. Turner, Kate M. Turner)
(Column 03)
Summary: Ella Franklin Ide and Annie Baldwin Ide, daughters of Louis Ide, died on May 4th. Ella was 8 and Annie 9 years old.
(Names in announcement: Ella Franklin Ide, Annie Baldwin Ide, Louis Ide)
(Column 03)
Summary: Estelle Sophie Ide, daughter of Prof. L. Ide died on May 12th. She was 3 years old. "May the 'Lord temper the wind to the shorn Lambs.'"
(Names in announcement: Estelle Sophie Ide, Prof. L. Ide)

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